Gender and Marriage in Graceling
Category A, Prompt D
Throughout the text, a predominant source of fear and frustration
for Katsa is being owned. This fear is founded in her relationship with her
Uncle, who has for years held control over her actions and treated her as a
tool for his desires, but it becomes a more complex issue when it comes to the other
relationships in Katsa’s life, particularly those romantic ones. The passage I
chose takes place over chapter 20, in which Katsa has fully realized her
feelings for Po, and he has offered to be with her in whatever way she is
comfortable. In the passage Katsa describes that “If she took Po as her
husband, she would be making promises about a future she couldn’t yet see. For
once she became his wife, she would be his wife forever. And, no matter how
much freedom Po gave her, she would always know that it was a gift. Her freedom
would not be her own; it would be Po’s to give or to withhold. That he never
would withhold it made no difference.” This is the clearest example of her
feelings about marriage and where her fears stem from.
Although it is not something brought to extreme focus in the novel, it is clear that in this world that Katsa lives in, women are beholden to men. Katsa’s Grace can be directly translated to mean that she is literally able to survive without a man in a place where it appears that ordinarily the security of a woman’s future is directly related to her marital status.It is no coincidence that Katsa and Po’s relationship is so often described and discussed in terms of consent. Po is constantly assuring her that he does not need her to change, that he would not control her. Katsa fear though is based in the belief that part of being with someone is giving up a bit of yourself even if the end you have only give up your happiness, as Po mentions. Consent is again mentioned in the moment it matters most, when they are together, Katsa saying “that this one time she would consent to hurt, and bleed, at his touch” and again it is tied to the idea of voluntarily giving something away, in this instance her virginity. Afterwards Katsa remarks “I have not lost myself”, a reaffirmation that although she is now involved with a man, she is still her own person and in control of herself.
Although it is not something brought to extreme focus in the novel, it is clear that in this world that Katsa lives in, women are beholden to men. Katsa’s Grace can be directly translated to mean that she is literally able to survive without a man in a place where it appears that ordinarily the security of a woman’s future is directly related to her marital status.It is no coincidence that Katsa and Po’s relationship is so often described and discussed in terms of consent. Po is constantly assuring her that he does not need her to change, that he would not control her. Katsa fear though is based in the belief that part of being with someone is giving up a bit of yourself even if the end you have only give up your happiness, as Po mentions. Consent is again mentioned in the moment it matters most, when they are together, Katsa saying “that this one time she would consent to hurt, and bleed, at his touch” and again it is tied to the idea of voluntarily giving something away, in this instance her virginity. Afterwards Katsa remarks “I have not lost myself”, a reaffirmation that although she is now involved with a man, she is still her own person and in control of herself.
Safeeyah,
ReplyDeleteI like that you focused on Katsa's autonomy concerning her views on marriage and gender. I, myself, found this the dominant theme in the novel, however, I focused on her individual autonomy vs the King's control over her. One comment I have in response to the novel, is the concept of having to give up a bit of herself in the case of marriage. I don't think marriage would hinder her, but rather empower her and could pave the way to enable Katsa with the means to empower others.
Safeeyah,
ReplyDeleteYes, Katsa's deepest fear is not having ownership over herself. And, it of course stems from her Uncle's control over her and use of her as an object, a tool. Under her Uncle's rule, she had no agency of her own, so she is not willing to give that agency away again. As you mention, with Po it is different in that she does want to give to him, but they clearly articulate what she is willing to do and what she is not willing to do so that she may retain her autonomy. While I think we may have understandings of marriages today that are more open and less about ownership, it could be that in this fantasy realm with Kings and Princes and Kingdoms, marriage is always going to convey ownership and control no matter who the husband is.